As far as I know, Alzheimer's doesn't run in my family. But I truly feel that I have an early case of it. I can't remember funny stories, I can't remember dates and I can't remember what someone said 5 minutes ago. It's scary. I feel like I have lost total control of my mind. In more ways than one.
Not only am I forgetful, I can't concentrate long enough on anything to really get a grasp on it. Could I have developed ADD in my adult life? Is MTV to blame? I can't decide if my lack of concentration is due to laziness or if there is some sort of chemical imbalance.
I can't form complete sentences. Proper grammar, definitions of words and speaking have all proven to be difficult tasks. I'm no longer positive of the correct protocol of how to write a letter, ask someone for a favor or just tell someone that I can't do something.
Is it stress?
I don't really feel stressed. Technically, I've been stressed since 2005. The beginning of the 5th year really wouldn't make much of a difference. Since my sophomore year in college my life has just been non-stop. Going here and there, doing this and that and running myself ragged.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.
There's a fog over my brain that has yet to lift. Maybe I just need a muse? A healthy dose of confidence? All I know is, I have to do it myself.